Having a healthy relationship is no less than a fairy tale. Holding hands and wandering around or enjoying a romantic sunset across sea beach is the perfect bonding with your partner. But it could ideally be the initial stages of any relationship. Will this beginning last for ever could be a question answer to which could not be that simple.
We just simply take a trip down the memory lane to feel the warmth of the same relationship that might have lost its charm and romance over the years. We just try to analyze and try to find out what went wrong! And try to put extra efforts to bring back those days. Let’s have an insight what could go wrong that was beyond or within your control but you could not do much about it.
1. Criticizing and Demoralizing Spirits
Each person is a bundle of good and bad traits. If your spouse or partner has some demerits, criticizing wouldn’t help, just ignore it and appreciate the attributes you like. Tell your partner how overcoming the drawbacks could make him/her a better person. With soothing and simple appeal things may work, not by bringing forth the bad attributes. He/she will surely like to overcome the drawbacks earnestly, irrespective of winning or losing. We often forget to say how much we love him/her as the qualities that he/she possesses are much stronger than the ones he/she doesn’t have. We often have to pay heavily for this mistake.
2. Emphasizing on ‘I’ instead of ‘We”
Being a couple you must understand using the word “I“ can ideally be a wrong connotation. Because now you are ‘we’, you both are one not apart from each other. It has been found that those couples are more successful and happier in their relationship who believes in the term ‘we’ not’ I’. You’re now a couple not individuals with diverse goals. We often forget to unit at emotional, social and financial level.
3. Disrespecting Each Other
It is a thumb rule – what you want for yourself, give it to others. Respect is very important in any relationship because it is the cornerstone of any relationship. We often disrespect our partner knowingly or unknowingly. Treating your partner with respect is the first condition for a healthy relationship. If you are not happy or do not agree with his decision or opinion, you can explain your point of view without going out of the way, just try to convince him/her but do not forget your courteous limits. Most of the time it will work may not always.
4. Distrusting Each Other
This is the most sensitive of all aspects that often lack in a relationship, although it is considered to be the base of any relationship. Trusting your partner, if he/she is not picking the phone if the phone is busy or switched off, better to keep calm and cool. Do not think too much and have faith. Doubt is the enemy of any relationship. It’s not only important in the relationship of a couple, but trust should be the base of every relationship that we live with on this earth. This is what strengthens your bounding.
5. Long Communication Gap
There are people who are least communicative. Although they are extremely happy and interactive with their family and friends, when it comes to their partner they become incommunicado. This is the major issue that may turn your relationship a roller coaster. It is always suggested to find out some time that would be entirely yours undisturbed by TV, mobile or anybody else. Sit together and plan your future with some humorous and joyful moments. Laugh, play and tease each other. Make it more interesting and romantic.
6. Not Accepting Mistakes
Being in a happy relationship is not a bed of roses. It has its own set of ups and downs. We often do not accept our mistake and put the blame to our partner for what went wrong. Even if your partner has made a mistake don’t make an issue out of that. We all are human and mistakes are normal human practice. We should learn our lesson and avoid committing it again. Instead of blaming others for the mistakes trust your partner and ensure that you have full faith in him/her. This is the best way to be in a healthy relationship.
7. Not Giving Space
All of us want our own time and space. Don’t suffocate him/her with your presence everywhere. Leave him/her on his/her own for some time. Don’t disturb your partner; just give him/her space. Every time calling, enquiring and spying is a big no for a healthy and successful relationship. Personal time is healing and soothing in everyone’s life. It is good for you too. Leave your partner unattended for few days or hours. It will actually enhance the romance and relationship and interest for each other.
8. Ignoring the Significance of Simple Gestures
This is important for every relationship that we have in our lives. Display of love physically like holding the hand, hugging, kissing or wrapping your arm around him/her is simple yet effective gestures that make you feel special. These are just like sweet candies that make its way to our hearts sweetening our entire life. It can change your mood, give a new ray of hope and confidence that you matter in someone’s life.
9. Unsupportive Attitude
If neither of you supports each other in any aspect, it’s the sign that your relationship is falling apart. Supporting each other is important. You may not agree with him/her in every way. Whatever may be the situation always stand beside him/her. Even if he/she is wrong! Correct him/her and try to stand with him/her on every occasion. You cannot change anyone in a day. Give him/her time to change and encourage him/her to do so and always stand by him/her at any odd. This will consolidate your relationship and make it rock solid over the time.
10. You Stop Caring
We often feel hurt for some reasons and stop expressing love towards our partner. Communication and expression are very important in every relation. If you are not very comfortable to express it being an introvert still there are ways that can help you express your love. Even a small gesture of smile will make it happen. Never wait too long to tell your partner how much you love him/her. A quick professional counseling can also help. It will always strengthen your relationship that will survive for long.
I am sure there are several undisclosed reasons too that land us to a bad relationship but it’s upon us to patch up and make it successful. Although you cannot change the destiny, you can, of course, change yourself to be in a better and smooth relationship. If you are ready to change yourself I am sure your partner will also make efforts.